What if you could re-live your favourite sexual experience? The same feelings, sights, smells, sounds, tastes, touches and emotions. Wouldn’t that be amazing?
Unfortunately, the reality is that it will never happen again!
Sorry about that, and there is nothing wrong with keeping it as a great memory and fantasy. However, one of the challenges that people face is trying to “get back” to where they were.
For example, if you have a long term partner it is not uncommon that at the beginning of the relationship it was hot, heavy and exciting and then over the years the intensity, frequency and sexual connection fizzled. I often hear “I want it the way that it used to be” or “I want to get back to where we were”. If you are single and had an amazing mind blowing experience, I often hear of people trying to re-enact the same experience.
The truth is you won’t “get it back”. And what is available to you is to create a new experience that will be different but just as good if not better than the experience that lives in your memory.
The reality is that things have changed, you have changed since you had that amazing sexual experience. Often when people try to re-live or re-enact the experience it fails to meet their expectations. The brain and has a funny ability to embellish memories and fill in the blanks to the point that even if you did recreate the experience perfectly it will fall short of your expectations which leads to disappointment.
If you see yourself in any of the above situations trying to cling onto the past or hope to experience the past again, let go of it. I challenge you to open yourself up to start thinking about creating something brand new that can be just as exciting and arousing. When you chase the past the future never comes and when you let go of the past you can create the future.
- Posted by Dr. Stephen de Wit
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